


Growing Pains

by Starwolf69



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Accidental Baby Acquisition, Children, Fluff, Growing pains hurt, Humor, Kidfic, M/M, No beta but would like one, Snakes, coparenting like champs, snek!babies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-15 22:00:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21260303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starwolf69/pseuds/Starwolf69
Summary: After an exciting day of playing outside and basking, two of the snildren need some TLC from their dads.





	Growing Pains

Aziraphale sighed happily. The snabies were mostly in bed – three in human beds, one in the aquarium and one dosing on the couch, snuggled tightly again Crowley with a book lying on her chest. Aziraphale gently took the book, placed a marker in the open spot, and put it on the side table. It had been a delightful day. Angelica, Junior, and Datura played hard all day in their child forms, even convincing their father to chase them. Clem slept in snake form on the stone wall in front of the cottage. Rosa dozed and read in the sun on the back patio, enjoying the best of both worlds. Yes, all in all, a delightful day with the children and his husband. 

The angel settled into a comfy chair with a nice cup of tea and a book he had been dying to begin, but had too many other things to do between the children and the new cottage. Taking in a deep breath, he opened the book, savoring the scent of brand new book that wafted from the pages. 

Two pages in, his reading was interrupted by a yelp from the one of the children’s rooms. The yelp was quickly followed by another. 

“Father! Father, help!”

Crowley jolted awake, startling Rosa awake too. Kissing his daughter on the forehead, he climbed over her and headed toward the crying. Aziraphale followed closely, noticing the Crowley’s little limp that sometimes came from walking too much.

Angelica met them in the hall. Yawning, she looked up at them sleepily, “Wha’s goin’ on?”

“Go back to bed, darling,” Aziraphale told her, turning her back toward the room she shared with Rosa. “Nothing to worry about.”

Both fathers looked in to the room Junior and Datura shared. Both children were sitting up in bed, tears streaming down their faces. Datura was rubbing their legs frantically while Junior tried to curl up as small as possible. Both were making a pitiful whimpering noise that nearly broke Aziraphale’s heart.

“Father!” Junior called reaching toward Crowley. 

“What’s going on, spawn?” he asked immediately going to his eldest’s side.

“Our legs hurt,” Datura moaned. “Really bad. Make it stop!”

Aziraphale hurried into the room. Junior and Datura whimpered pitifully from their beds. Aziraphale gently ran his hands down their legs, feeling terribly when his babies cried out in pain. 

“What do you think, Angel?” Crowley asked, worry marring his features. 

He sighed. “Nothing feels awry. I think . . . I think it might be growing pains.”

Crowley grunted. “Bah. They aren’t even close to having another shed.”

“I read about this in the childcare book,” Aziraphale insisted. “It is very common for children between ages eight and twelve. I’m guessing that they are around that age. Or equal to it. Plus, they had a very active day. Someone else I know gets leg pains when he spends a lot of time walking around.”

“Miracle it away?” Crowley suggested, making a face. 

The angel frowned. “I think we can fix this without . . . extraneous assistance. It never works for you so I doubt it would work for them. I know the book had something in it about helping with this issue.”

As he was turning to leave, Datura reached for him. “Don’t leave, Azirafather! Please. Please don’t leave. It hurts.”

“Now, now, darling,” he tutted to Datura. Stroking their face, he smiled. “I’ll be right back, okay? Father is here and I’ll be right   
back to fix you up.”

“Make it tickety-boo?” Datura asked with a sniffle.

Aziraphale kissed their forehead. “Absolutely tickety-boo, sweetheart.”

Aziraphale went to his bookshelves, searching for their go-to book on child care. Crowley sat down on Junior’s bed and began gently rubbing his legs. Junior hissed a little and whimpered.

“It hurts so much, Father.”

“I know it does. Angel dad is going to get you fixed up.”

“Tickety-boo?” Junior asked, groaning when he moved.

Crowley rolled his eyes and nodded. “Tick-et-ty-boo. Hanging in, Tura?”

Datura winced as they tried to lie back down. “Yes, Father. Can you rub my legs too?”

Crowley knelt between the beds, arms stretched out, awkwardly rubbing one leg of each child. They keened softly, hissing and sniffling if they moved. 

“I think Clem is right,” Junior said. “Legs are very troublesome.”

“Too true,” Crowley agreed. “But useful and kind of worth it. By the way, love the shirts.”

Both children had the decency to blush and look a little guilty. Junior was wearing one of Crowley’s black t-shirts and black sleep pants. Datura was in one of Crowley’s numerous Queen shirts and red boxers. They both whimpered pitifully as they tried to get comfortable.

Datura told him, “They smell like you, Father. And they are comfy.”

Aziraphale returned, after herding Rosa to bed and making a stop at the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. He considered Crowley kneeling between the beds for a moment before shaking his head. He put a bottle of children’s pain reliever and a glass of water on the night-table between the beds. Handing a heading pad to Crowley, he plugged the other heating pad in next to Datura’s bed. 

“Darling, show me where it hurts, please.”

Datura threw back the blankets and rubbed their hands over their calves. “Here, Azirafather. It really hurts.”

“I know, darling, but this will help,” Aziraphale told them, putting their legs on heating pad and covering them back up. “Now let’s keep your legs warm. From what I read, this sounds like normal muscle pain or growing pains. Let’s get you something for the ache.”

Aziraphale gave them one tablet and the glass to get a drink. Fluffing their pillows and finding their favorite black cat plushie, he settled them back and fixed their blankets. 

“Me too, Azirafather!” Junior whined. “Me too! Father, rub more.”

“No, Azirafather!” Datura moaned. “Rub my legs. Please?”

Aziraphale kissed their forehead. “I’ll be right back. I need to help your brother.”

Crowley dutifully rubbed Junior’s legs, keeping the massage firm and steady. Aziraphale gave Junior a pain relief tablet and a drink before he returned to sit on Datura’s bed and massaged his legs. Eventually, the heating pads, the massages, and pain relievers worked enough to allow both children to fall asleep. Crowley looked over at Aziraphale, nodding a little. They stood very slowly as not to wake their sleeping spawn. Aziraphale fussed with the blankets over each child, tucked Junior’s snake plushie next to him, and kissed them both on the forehead gently. Crowley took Aziraphale’s hand as they padded into the room across the hall. They tucked Angelica and Rosa in then went to check on Clem. When all the children were tucked in and definitely asleep, Crowley smiled at Aziraphale. 

Leaning close to the angel’s ear, he whispered with a little laughter in his voice, “So, how about if we go to bed and you can rub my legs?”

**Author's Note:**

> I remember these "growing pains" and I remember sitting with my kiddo when she got them. About the only thing that helps is a heating pad and a parent rubbing them away. 
> 
> This fic takes place a few days after OlwenDylluan's "In Which Crowley and Clem Have a Talk."
> 
> Many thanks to Kedreeva for creating this glorious sandbox!


End file.
